71 Serendipity Place, Saturday Morning

[chosehumanity]

Life on Fandom, Mitchell could get used to. All the vampires with none of the bloodlust, a room full of good kids every week he'd so far not even felt the slightest urge to harm, and a housemate that didn't send his senses into overdrive.

Even if the housemate in question was a twat who could use a good smacking one of these days, but Mitchell was choosing to look at things from the bright side. For one, he now had a credible excuse to make a mess of the place - it upset Arnie. That kept him in good spirits.

That was the entire explanation why he was spending his morning eating old Chinese food from the fridge on their beaten-up couch, surrounded by an old pizza box or two. Life was good.

[ open to housemate and visitors! ]

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[uptheziggurat.livejournal.com]

For a hologram, someone certainly made enough noise coming down the stairs in his shined regulation boots. He turned sharply to head for the kitchen when he noticed Mitchell and his face curdled like old milk at the mess around him.

"That's disgusting, you know. Absolutely disgusting."

[chosehumanity]

"It's good," Mitchell called, shoving another mouthful of noodles into his mouth. "Morning, Arnie."

If Rimmer thought he was going to call him anything else, he was sadly mistaken.

[uptheziggurat.livejournal.com]

If one stuck with the dairy comparison, Rimmer could be said to have the equivalent of a good piece of Stilton on his face at that.

"It's atrocious," he answered, reaching over to pick up one of the pizza boxes. He waggled it in the air.

"There's not even anything in these but crumbs. Are you trying to attract cockroaches? Or just to imitate your natural habitat?"

[chosehumanity]

"Calm down," Mitchell said, easily, fishing around in the box for a few more good scraps with the edge of his chopstick. "I don't know we've even got any cockroaches around here, mate."

[uptheziggurat.livejournal.com]

"No, I suppose not. Not with the smegging squirrels around."

He walked over to the trash bin and shoved the pizza box in.

"It's probably your fault I was dragged away the other night."

Rimmer came back for the other box.

"They probably feel welcome here, what with the 24 hour buffet laying around."

[chosehumanity]

"At least you're making friends," Mitchell offered. Only half of it was mockery. Really. He brought the last strands of noodle up to his mouth.

[uptheziggurat.livejournal.com]

Rimmer glared at him and his voice came out tight between his teeth.

"Friends?"

[chosehumanity]

Mitchell let the glare pass through over him. He put the empty container aside (obviously, he wasn't about to clean it up yet) and said, "You do know the word, right?"

[uptheziggurat.livejournal.com]

He reached out to snatch the empty container.

"Of course I have" had "friends, you idiot," he snapped, "but I wouldn't exactly call a passel of drunken busy-body squirrels who abducted my Lightbee in the night my friends!"

[chosehumanity]

"I'm just saying, maybe a man of your disposition shouldn't choose to be so picky," Mitchell said, toying with his chopsticks. He sank back into the couch, nice and relaxed. "They obviously like you."

[uptheziggurat.livejournal.com]

The box went into the trash as well.

"'A man of your---' what the smeg do you mean by that?"

[chosehumanity]

"So easy-going," Mitchell said. It wasn't that he wasn't up to removing his own trash, but it was ludicrously easy to let Arnie deal with it without even trying. "Sometimes I can barely even see your nostrils flaring when you talk."

[uptheziggurat.livejournal.com]

His shoulders dropped. ahh. Familiar territory. Outright mocking.

"Funny. Very funny," and there was a pause as he almost said 'Listy' and had to correct himself. What was that?

"I'll have you know, I was exceedingly popular back at school. All the children made sure to see me every day."

To steal his lunch money.
To dunk his head in the toilet.
To stuff him in his locker.
To throw things at his head.

...the list went on, of course, but give the man his delusions.

[wantstobehuman.livejournal.com]

Oh, look! Or, perhaps more accurately, listen! There was a knocking at the door.

[chosehumanity]

That was enough for Mitchell to finally get up and stop lazing about on the couch. He had an inkling who it might be, so he'd already started on the "G," by the time the door fully opened. "Eorge. Hey."

[wantstobehuman.livejournal.com]

"Mitchell," he began, barging in past the vampire, grocery bags in hand. "Please tell me you have a kitchen." He hadn't yet looked around to see the state of the house.

[chosehumanity]

"Yeah, it's right down there," Mitchell volunteered, pointing down the hall. He was used to all the barging by now; cool under fire was his middle name.

[wantstobehuman.livejournal.com]

George nodded and went down the hall, saying, "Perfect, thanks, the cabins have no resources for cooking a proper meal and I need real food, Mitchell, you have no idea how much- OH MY GOD."

A moment passes. George backs out of the kitchen.

"Mitchell, please tell me you have some variety of cleaning supplies in the house. What have you been doing in there? Have you thrown out anything since you moved in?"

[chosehumanity]

"I think Arnie's thrown out a bunch of stuff," Mitchell volunteered about thirty seconds later, when he appeared (and leaned in) the doorway. "Why?"

[wantstobehuman.livejournal.com]

George put his grocery bags down in the hallway outside the kitchen (after first making certain that the hallway was at least a little bit cleaner than the kitchen) and replied, "I think I need a hazmat suit. Cleaning supplies? Please?" He pushed up his sleeves. "If I'm going to be cooking, I need to clean in here first."

[chosehumanity]

"You better watch out for those killer cockroaches, now, George," Mitchell said, grinning briefly. "Under the sink." He brought his cigarette up to his lips and took a pull. "It's not that bad. I think it looks homey."

[wantstobehuman.livejournal.com]

"Homey?" George practically dove under the sink, pulling out a bucket, several sponges, and four different cleaning products. Including bleach. "You would say that, I remember what your flat was like in Bristol before I got there, I don't know why I'm surprised about this. I suppose it was because you've got a housemate. Honestly, Mitchell, how can you live like this?"

[chosehumanity]

"With ease," Mitchell assured him, taking a pull off his cigarette before plowing on into his own kitchen. "Calm."

He was telling a lot of people that, lately.

[wantstobehuman.livejournal.com]

George was already piling trash into a garbage bag -- he bypassed the bin entirely, there wasn't any point -- as the bucket filled with hot water in the sink. "But it's- there's- It's disgusting."

[chosehumanity]

"It's just a few empty pizza boxes and some cups." Mitchell found a nice counter to lean against while he smoked. "You sound like Arnie. That's not a good look, George."